Happy Birthday month to me...

For those of you who don't know, I've often celebrated my birthday month... Starting April 1, lasting though my birthday, the 30th, it's kind of been a long running joke with my family. A time for everyone to be extra special to me :~)

But Happy Birthday month to me, head pounding, as I sit here watching everyone board the plane. I had a busy day of packing and unpacking, crying then packing again.

The plane is quite empty as classical music pipes through the speakers. I hope it stays this way. I don't want to talk, to cry, I just want to sit here.

For the last two hours we sat at the airport. We got all checked in and Praise the Lord they didn't weigh my bags, that's $45 bucks I didn't have to pay to check the bag of donations. We sat at the bar, this funny little bar right by security and drank yucky wine... if it wasn't poured right in front of me I would have sworn it was box wine... not that there's anything wrong with box wine :~)

The overhead bins are closing now, how interesting, British Airways has a safety net thing so when you open them the cabin isn't simply open, it has this net... that's a neat feature.

Sitting here, roughly 30 minutes after boarding, plane is still not moving, knees up to my throat and a TV screen maybe 12" away from my face. Everything still seems extremely surreal as I sit here on the plan waiting for departure.

What in the world am I doing?

Seldom do I ask myself this. What I'm doing seems so bold and I feel I have become so reserved since my mothers death. So fearful of everything, all the unknowns. Perhaps this trip is harder than others would be considering last time I was in Africa she passed so this trip comes with many association fears and mixed emotions.

I'm wearing a quaint yellowish green beaded bracelet my sister gave me earlier today at lunch - she's so thoughtful, and I'm writing in this journal Adam gave me, sigh, the journal.

Apparently the gift for one yea anniversaries is paper. I don't know who made this list of gifts, but paper... come on.... Normally I would protest such a gift with great strength; however, as usual, Adam blows my mind with his creativity and love. Instead of simply giving me a card and saying that is the gift of paper or something, he lays in my hand a beautiful journal filled with writings and pictures of us.

God thank you for such an amazing husband who supports and encourages me to pursue such things as this three month internship in Uganda.

Nearly four pages in, I'm still sitting here, head pounding, knees to my throat, wishing we'd take off already. I cried and cried, boy did I cry all the way through security, looking back, waving and blowing Adam kisses. By the time I got through security and repacked everything, I turned around and he was gone. Back to the car, through probably still in the lot asking yourself the same question... What the hell am I doing jetting off to Uganda, quitting my job to go, taking only a handful of personal items and a gob of donations.

Pushback.

We're moving... feeling a bit strange without my wedding, wearing this simple, light band as a more "Uganda appropriate" external symbol of my marriage...feeling mixed emotions about being away from friends, family and Adam for so long. Feeling anxious about the wide array of unknowns and feeling lonely and empty.

Finally in flight, I cannot for the life of me remember where in the myriad of bags and stuff I put my headache meds (damn cheep wine). I just took off my shoes, thought I'd relax.

Stretch... sigh.

Wait!!! Stuck?!??!?!? What?

Oh man, are you kidding me? Not only did someone just spray their terible duty free purfume, but the plane is bouncing all over and my sock is stuck in gum... fantastic... how did I not step in the gum when I had my shoe on, but now, that my vulnerable sock is exposed... smack... right there - a big 'ol gob on my heel... fantastic. I guess this leaves me 8 pairs for the remaining 3 months in Africa.

Wow, we're really bouncing, Adam's lucky. I surely would have gouged through his arm by this point with my nails and white knuckles... can't they do something? This is why I don't go on amusement park rides... don't like the bouncing and butterflies in my tummy.

Sign - going to try to get some sleep.

We landed right on time - 9am London time. Then we sat on the tarmac for 40 minutes, then I had to take a 20 min. bus to terminal 4, at which time I thought my eyes would find the sigh directing me to the Hilton where I had reserved a room to rest and shower before my flight tonight to Uganda. However, once in Terminal 4 I was instructed to stand in a huge security line to enter Terminal 4... so I did, only to reach the front and be re-directed out of line over to customs where I stood for an hour, with my carry-on backpack digging into my shoulders.

After making my way through customs, I was so hot and sweaty and literally felt my shoulders were bleeding so I thought best to take a cab to the Hilton and give up hope of walking there, wherever it may be. I enter the Taxi line, momentarily forgetting the increasing pain I'm in due to this bag as my face lights up at the cut little taxi cars... they are like out of a movie... I reach the front of the line, tell the taxi driver I'm headed to the Hilton in Terminal 4, and he refuses to take me because it's less than a 200 meter (however far that is :~D) walk. Bursting into tears I explain I cannot walk any further and he counters my water works with disdain at my inability to make it 200 meters and refuses to take me. Charging back into the terminal in search of someone who can direct me to this illusive hotel (which boasts of its accessibility from Terminal 4) I apparently enter a private, restricted area, setting off an alarm in the airport. I'm then met by an airport worker informing me I'm not allowed in that area (as if the siren didn't tell me that). Still crying, I explain I'm just trying to get to the Hilton. He re-directs me, to which I get lost again, and finally, 20 minutes later I arrive at the Hilton. A little over 2 hours after I landed.

Sigh...

After checking in I ventured down to the lobby (hair a fray, blood shot eyes and face all splotchy from crying) to order a Club Sandwich. What a delicious, yet odd sandwich. Shortly after ordering, sitting in front of me was a sandwich consisting of lettuce, tomato, chicken breast, ham slices (like Christmas ham, not lunch meat ham), and a fried egg. Hmm... who knew it'd be so tasty.

Returning to my room and finally taking off my sticky sock, I climbed into bed for a 3 hour nap.

stretch.....

Now I'm sitting here in a chair, listening to the G20 Summit.

Alright, time to shower, re-pack my bag, have a bite to eat and make the journey back over to Terminal 5, allowing plenty of time for any obstacles which may arise, ensuring I'm at my gate in time for my 9:30pm departure for Entebbe, Uganda.